This Valentine’s Day, Build a Date for this Lonely Godzilla

Kaiju Super Datetech is a puzzle platformer developed by Powerhoof. It’s available for PC on the itch.io site for a “name your own price.”

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A monstrous beast had risen out of the ocean to ravage the futuristic Kyoto 2. It was up to me, a nameless businessman, to single-handedly distract the creature by building a robot she would find attractive enough to date.

They picked the right employee. As a married man, I knew a thing or two about dating. I immediately got to work building exactly what the monster would love: the tall, silent, three-armed type. I grabbed my scrap metal, rotated them just right, and got welding. I named him RoboBoy, my beautiful robot child. He shall be a perfect match.

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However, as we all know, love is never that simple. Not only did I have to make a hunky boyfriend, I had to physically get him over to where the monster was waiting. This involved traversing terrain that just loved to topple my RoboBoy over and over. I needed a new game plan. I disassembled my creation and he became reborn as a three-legged model of masculine beauty.

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It worked! The three wheel-legs helped balance RoboBoy as he marched on to meet his soulmate. He grew up right before my eyes. He was no longer a RoboBoy, he was a RoboMan.

We arrived at the monster, a handsome devil of a robot and his dad/wingman. As we approached the monster, she applied a critical eye to her wooer, and was thorough enough to even score his appearance. Luckily I had thrown in a single eye on his face, a traffic light, and some shades. There was no way she would deny him.

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With Japan saved, I thought I was ready to relax, but I guess she recommended the place to her friends, as more kaiju set themselves onto the city. A match-maker’s work is never done.

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